Quilon dismisses talk of Arsenal move

The rumour linking Arsenal with Benfica midfielder Javi Garcia has been ruled out by the player?s agent. Garcia was reportedly a target for Arsenal with Manchester United also thought to be interested in the former Real Madrid player. However, Garcia?s agent, Manuel Garcia Quilon said: ?The only interest from Arsenal in the player is what [...]

Source: http://www.footballfancast.com/2011/11/premiership/arsenal-premiership/quilon-dismisses-talk-of-arsenal-move

Aleksander Kolarov Kolo Toure Jamie Carragher Jose Bosingwa

Posted in General | Comments Off

Speed: Olympics down to playersSpeed: Olympics down to players

Manager Gary Speed rejected suggestions that he or the Football Association of Wales could attempt to “intimidate” Gareth Bale and captain Aaron Ramsey into making themselves unavailable for Team GB at next year’s Olympics…

Source: http://www.football.co.uk/wales/speed__olympics_down_to_players_rss1934446.shtmlhttp:www.football.co.uk

Heurelho Gomes Tomasz Kuszczak Brad Friedel Tim Howard

Posted in General | Comments Off

?This is all the CSA?s fault?

A list of phrases familiar to Canada fans.

Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/TheFootyBlog/~3/ATwWko_Ck4E/

Liverpool Man City Man United Newcastle

Posted in General | Comments Off

Neymar: I´m making history

Santos striker Neymar believes he is making history by spurning the advances of Barcelona and Real Madrid in favour of…

Source: http://www.soccernews.com/neymar-i%c2%b4m-making-history/82522/

Michael Turner Paul Konchesky Richard Stearman Clint Hill

Posted in General | Comments Off

Prandelli after ´continuity´ despite absences

Cesare Prandelli is aiming for a sense of continuity in Italy’s line-up, despite the enforced absence of his first-choice strikers.

Source: http://www.soccerway.com/news/2011/November/11/prandelli-after-continuity-despite-absences

Sebastien Bassong Wes Brown Chris Baird Alan Hutton

Posted in General | Comments Off

Levein set to blood new facesLevein set to blood new faces

Scotland manager Craig Levein is looking to bolster his squad’s strength in depth ahead of a keenly competitive World Cup qualifying group by handing game time to some fringe players in Cyprus on Friday night…

Source: http://www.football.co.uk/scotland/levein_set_to_blood_new_faces_rss1933644.shtmlhttp:www.football.co.uk

Adam Bogdan Mike Pollitt Jason Brown Andy Marshall

Posted in General | Comments Off

Azzurri will not change tactics to suit Balotelli or PazziniAzzurri will not change tactics to suit Balotelli or Pazzini

Italy coach Cesare Prandelli has ruled out making tactical changes to their game despite having to deploy a “physically stronger” attacking duo in the absence of Antonio Cassano and Giuseppe Rossi…

Source: http://www.football.co.uk/chelsea/azzurri_will_not_change_tactics_to_suit_balotelli_or_pazzini_rss1932907.shtmlhttp:www.football.co.uk

Kaspars Gorkss Steve Gohouri Michael Turner Paul Konchesky

Posted in General | Comments Off

‘Slave, my a***’ ? Former Manchester United goalkeeper Kevin Pilkington hits out at Tomasz Kuszczak’s claims

Source: http://www.goal.com/en/news/9/england/2011/11/08/2747995/slave-my-a-former-manchester-united-goalkeeper-kevin

Ledley King Sylvain Distin Jerome Boateng #VALUE!

Posted in General | Comments Off

Ultimate Performance Helvellyn Number+Nutrition Race Belt

Ultimate Performance Helvellyn Number+Nutrition Race Belt – Our Price: £8.99

Source: http://www.physioroom.com/product/Ultimate_Performance_Helvellyn_Number_Nutrition_Race_Belt/3344/39103.html

Steven Taylor Sam Ricketts Ronnie Stam Stephen Ward

Posted in General | Comments Off

The Fiver | A unique brand of cobblers; and toilets | Barry Glendenning and Paolo Bandini

Click here to have the Fiver sent to your inbox every weekday at 5pm, or if your usual copy has stopped arriving

DIRECT MARKETING

The many Newcastle fans who have spent recent weeks whining and moaning about their club not getting the media coverage it deserves will have been relieved last night when it emerged, courtesy of media outlets nationwide, that St James’ Park is to be rebranded as the Sports Direct Arena as part of owner Mike Ashley’s plan to sell the naming rights of the stadium.

Quite apart from the fact that Ashley is clearly dancing on the often unmarked graves of millions of war dead by refusing to rename St James’ Park the Poppy Drome, his wheeze seems fiendish in its cunning: wait for a quiet day shortly after the deadline on your recent half-price season ticket offer has expired and everyone’s attention is focussed on international football and assorted badge-related nonsense, release the news with a strict late-night embargo and hope the ensuing fan outrage about putting a pound sign on 131 years of tradition has died down by the time your next home game comes around in three weeks’ time.

Of course, with there being no chance that the pitchfork and torch-waving hordes will have given up rattling the gates of St James’ Pa ? sorry, the Sports Direct Arena by the time Chelsea come to town on the first weekend of December, Ashley has made the shrewd move of renaming the ground after his own company for the time being, meaning that he’ll happily soak up all the flak until the heat eventually dies down, before selling the naming rights to the highest bidder ? hopefully a syndicate of wealthy Sunderland fans who will rename the stadium Roker Park.

“We might own the club, but the fans own the spirit,” smarmed Ashley’s mouthpiece Derek Llambias, talking a unique brand of cobblers, even by the standards of patronising club officials. “We understand the heritage and we understand the history, but we want to provide affordable football for the fans of this club. We are currently third in the table and long may that continue but to do so will take investment,” he continued, failing to reveal what had happened to the money Newcastle got from Liverpool after gulling them into paying £35m for Andy Carroll.

While Newcastle fans are predictably unimpressed by the rebranding of their stadium, it’s difficult to see what exactly they can or will do about it. For all their moaning about Ashley and Llambias being a pair of blundering incompetents with no idea how to run a football club, they seem happy to continue pouring money into the coffers of a regime that looks increasingly shrewd, having appointed Alan Pardew as manager (attracting much derision from fans in the process), shipped out a load of dead wood (attracting much derision from fans in the process) and replaced them more than adequately on the cheap (attracting much derision from fans in the process).

And even now with the club sitting third in the Premier League almost entirely as a result of business decisions made by Ashley and his henchman, they continue to attract the ire of locals who, typically of football fans, are happy to protest about various perceived injustices, as long as it doesn’t involve any effort or sacrifice beyond a pre-match “march” from a pub they were going to be in anyway to a match they were going to anyway. Meanwhile outside St James’ Pa ? sorry, the Sports Direct Arena, Ashley laughs up his sleeve as the House Full sign lights up again.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

“A lot of the women just want to chat but you do get the odd rude request” – former Burnley defender Danny Pitham reveals the perks of signing a deal to appear on an adult video phone chat app.

EVERY LOOSER WINS

As anyone who has ever been caught short at a match will realise, toilet facilities at football stadiums can leave something to be desired. Little wonder, then, that when organisers of the Best Loosers competition to find the worst football club toilets in Britain offered a £100,000 upgrade to the winners, certain teams’ supporters should attempt to influence the decision.

Rather than spend a penny to impress the organisers, the fans had simply been voting multiple times in the online poll which will determine the winner. “They had to cancel it because people were cheating. I think some fans were voting 30 times,” parped Oldham chief suit Alan Hardy, before urging fans to ensure the team don’t finish the voting as a No2. “The money has just not been there in the past to revamp the toilets. I have been here for 31 years and some of the toilets are still the same now as they were then.”

“It became clear quite quickly that some fans had managed to get around the security checks and were making multiple votes for their team,” tooted the competition’s spokeswoman, Janet Bentick. “I suppose it is testament to how passionately they feel about having new facilities installed at their clubs but it breached our terms and conditions.”

FIVER LETTERS

“You’ve got some cheek. You attack the shameful and ostentatious appropriation of the Poppy Appeal that is currently afoot, and at the same time crowbar a searing and inspirational polemic into yesterday’s edition that desecrates the memory of thousands of editions of the Fiver that have gone before you. Please show a bit of self-awareness, eh?” – James A Crane.

“No need to get all sarky about the poppy furore. You could easily have written the entire piece criticising the popinjays at Fifa for its absurd stance. Why take an anti-England, anti-rememberance angle instead? Letter trolling?” – J McAferty.

“Can I suggest that, for any future early-November friendlies, England wear their red away shirt? We can all pretend that it shows a poppy in extreme close-up, while Fifa bureaucrats and EDL fools alike will be happy” – Joe Gregory.

“I read that Christopher Heaton-Harris, the Conservative MP and referee, had waded into the poppy debate. Has any one person ever tried so hard to earn the scorn and contempt of the entire nation?” – Declan Hackett.

Send your letters to the.boss@guardian.co.uk. And if you’ve nothing better to do you can also tweet the Fiver.

BITS AND BOBS

Despite nobody suggesting otherwise, England keeper Joe Hart insists the team had no plans to defy Fifa’s ban against wearing poppies against Spain. “It’s not how we play the game. Fifa is the law,” he wibbled.

Not ones to pass up the opportunity to leap aboard a passing bandwagon, the Premier League plans to honour those that fell in the first world war with a ‘Christmas Truce’ youth tournament in Ypres involving Man Utd, Borussia Dortmund, Lens and Genk. Really.

Kenny Dalglish has got the radge on with scheduling that has left his Liverpool side playing Man City and Chelsea in the space of 48 hours later this month. “It is disgraceful in this day and age,” he fumed.

Michael Appleton is the new manager of Portsmouth after leaving his role as West Brom No2. “The supporters are renowned throughout the football world for being very loud,” he said, as a tattooed man in a blue top hat rang a bell in his ear.

And former Man Utd and Pope’s O’Rangers defender Henning Berg wants the vacant Hibernian manager’s job. “I know they have great facilities at the stadium and training ground,” he said, conspicuously failing to mention the players.

STILL WANT MORE?

KER-CHING! That’s the noise of another tiny piece of football’s soul being sold with the news St James’ Park will be called the Sports Direct Arena, reckons David Conn.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! KRRRRRRUPPPPP! BLING!!!!!! That’s the noise of the little robot librarian in Jonathan Wilson’s brain picking out the choicest information for his blog previewing the Euro 2012 play-offs.

EFFING HELL!!!! That’s the noise of you, the reader, exclaiming in wonder at some of the delights in this week’s Classic YouTube, including a no-armed golfer and goal-scoring referees.

“JUST GETTING A TOUCH WOULD BE NICE”. That’s literally the noise Bobby Zamora made when he was interviewed by Dominic Fifield ahead of England v Spain.

WOOP! WOOP! That’s the sound of the police, says KRS-One.

SIGN UP TO THE FIVER

Want your very own copy of our free tea-timely(ish) email sent direct to your inbox? Has your regular copy stopped arriving? Click here to sign up.

WHY DIDN’T $EXUALLY CONFIDENT GITANES-SUCKING PHILOSOPHER FIVER TELL US THE PARIS METRO HAD EFF ALL ESCALATORS?


guardian.co.uk © 2011 Guardian News and Media Limited or its affiliated companies. All rights reserved. | Use of this content is subject to our Terms & Conditions | More Feeds


Source: http://feeds.guardian.co.uk/~r/theguardian/football/rss/~3/Is_z27VgXZM/the-fiver-newcastle-naming-rights

Wolves Petr Cech Joe Hart

Posted in General | Comments Off